Thursday, May 29, 2008

No-One Knows (Me)

I am mumbling to myself again
My tongue moves in my mouth
Suddenly I have no front teeth
Where did they go
I can't feel them
Panic rises
Then the feeling comes back
I can feel them
They are still there
It's over before I can react
No-one knows

I'm looking at the computer screen
My eyes burning
I can still see around me
But my eyes burnt out
Empty holes of black soot
Burning won't stop burning
Then nothing
It's over before I can react
No-one knows

My brain I can feel my brain
In my head is this pressure
Sometimes is gripping my brain
Like warm blood flowing in my head
Then it stops
It's over before I can react
No-one knows

Talking to you I lose myself
Go somewhere else inside
I start thinking of deep personal things
Things I don't want you to know
Then I realize you can read my thoughts
I am about to freak out
Then it endsIt's over before I can react
No-one knows

I look at a picture of myself in my teens
I feel guilt for not being stronger
Thoughts come into my head
14 year old me wants to stab the 21 year old me
I can feel the fearI don't know what to do
Then I come out of it
It's over before I can react
No-one knows ... No one knows...
No one understands...